mega megan (retrofab) wrote in cleveland_core,
mega megan
retrofab
cleveland_core

12th grade core students:
Body:

• You know what Core sandals are
• You remember Mr. Coleman’s dream
• You know what’s going on between Mr. Linn and Ms. White
• You also know what’s going on in Ms. Gifford’s room at lunch . . . or have a good idea
• Mr. Linn says “hello” to you in the hall
• You’ve stopped obsessing about Mr. Coleman (because you know it’s not as big as everyone thinks)
• You know what “blunch” is
• The night before an essay, you don’t have an outline . . . and it doesn’t really matter
• Being called a fucking idiot by Mr. Linn is a compliment
• Thanks to pop art, you are now the owner of the largest pack of gum/condoms/cigarettes on your block
• The RAPs on Mr. Posito’s board are not meant for you
• You remember Ms. Frame
• Not only do you remember Ms. Frame, you remember when she let someone smoke in class
• You know what I mean when I say, “she’s channeling Ms. Frame”
• You’re beginning to think that Spice Girlsism really would create a better society
• Your midterm total has hit double digits
• You now use “I” statements in your essays
• “IUE” is now a foreign word
• You know to wear a watch the day of Linn exams
• You run through more ink and paper than is healthy
• It’s cooler to go to sleep before eleven than to stay up all night
• You haven’t used “ethnocentrism” lately
• Writer’s cramp is a very familiar feeling
• You have really good (or really bad) task group memories
• You’ve heard the word “folks” used one too many times
• Part of the reason you want to go to UCLA is to see Bret (the pictures on his MySpace put him in a whole new light)
• You think it’s weird that some classrooms don’t have paintings on the walls
• You can B.S. like a pro
• There’s a good chance you can spell Nietzsche or Dostoevsky, and possibly Sartre
• On an essay, you can’t fit more than two words per line
• Your writing looks like shit
• You’re thrilled when Gifford comments that, “Your writing isn’t all that bad”
• An in class essay is just as serious as Mr. Linn’s wardrobe
• The last packet you read was in tenth grade
• Or, conversely, you read and highlight every packet religiously
• You’ve seriously considered becoming a communist or turning atheist
• You didn’t remember Bafa Bafa until you read this
• Your essays are distinguished by the absence or lack of thinking
• Core periods have become the mythical nap period
• Everyone knows that special “awlriiiiiiight”
• You wonder about Mr. Wilf’s home life
• Actually, you wonder about all of the Core teachers’ home lives
• You know Mr. Wilf’s history with porn
• You have caught up on three years of class naps in at least on class
• You’ve seen Wilf run in short shorts
• You’ve taken a piss next to Mr. Wilf or Vitaly
• Sitting in Mr. Linn’s room feels like an acid trip
• You’ve been in Mr. Miller’s class more than one year and still haven’t looked at every part of his room
• You tried your best to distance yourself from Ary when he gave his speech on women
• You know how every girl in your grade got their periods
• You relish the image of Mr. Cameron quaking
• You know where the phrase “Mr. Lemmon you are tall and regal, too bad our relationship would be illegal” comes from
• You almost cried the day your pop art was due because everyone’s was better than yours
• You remember when Travis was “Travvy-bear”
• You also remember where he proposed to Ms. Frame
• You can walk and study at the same time
• You can study in the shower
• We all know how we’re “feeling today” and your experiences are “intense”
• You still don’t know what SI stands for
• Your teachers compare you to their dogs
• You refer to classes by the name of the teacher
• You’re called a sinner at least once a day
• You know more about your teachers’ personal lives than you know about your own
• You’re concerned if you don’t hear the word “fuck” in your classes
• A question isn’t a question unless it says “fully explain in your own words”
• You are impressed with Ms. Gifford’s Seven Jeans and Converse
• You have favorite Linn and Gifford outfits
• You spend time mimicking your teachers
• You’ve gone to the bathroom at least once with a Core packet
• You buy highlighters in bulk
• Highlighting is futile because you highlight everything
• Paden and Rodriguez drama is legendary
• Half of your essay is in quotations
• You’ve been roared at by Ms. Gifford
• You want to come back and be a Core teacher
• Someone you know memorizes outlines with a song
• You have debates about whether Mr. Coleman or Mr. Posito would win in a brawl
• You have debates about whether Mr. Linn wears boxers or briefs
• E Hall is home
• You know that it will take the whole passing period to get through E Hall
• You know half your friends will go to Berkeley
• Three-quarters of your friends had Chinese slippers and/or Ugg boots
• Your tenth and twelfth grade teachers asked if you studied the Inuits . . . and you said no
• The definition of digression is “I won’t be taking notes for awhile”
• You find the math-Core feud hilarious
• You were in Posito’s class when it was in J Hall
• You stopped counting how many pages you wrote on your midterms
• You wholeheartedly believe that a thesis will come to you the morning of the exam . . . or rather when you get your paper
• “Conroy” is a dirty word
• You had/have Anstead as a teacher
• The worst thing you can be called is a racist
• You know someone who has been blessed by Mr. Coleman before the AP Art exam
• You walk around with ink all over the side of your hand
• You’ve had a take-home midterm
• You didn’t have an essay involving Hamlet, Kant, Phedre, or Hume
• You know that a Core packet bonfire would get so big it would probably kill someone
• But you’d like to have one anyway
• You know what Core paper is and you know that it must have a stripe
• You understand the necessity of having multiple pens on test day
• It would require an entire dumpster to get rid of all your Core stuff
• You have made up words on more than one occasion . . . for instance, what is the plural form of consciousness?
• Rather than figuring out what you need to include on a midterm to get an A, you figure out who needs to grade it for you to get an A
• You are familiar with the slash method of grading: A/B, B+/B . . . etc.
• You’ve been on Core longer than some of the teachers
• Outlines are only for in-class essays
• You’ve written more essays in class than at home
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